Something happened on Friday night that I’m not yet ready to share on this blog. I’m not even sure if I’ll ever share the fully story here as it doesn’t directly concern me, but someone I care so dearly about. My very best friend and so much more.
I recently rediscovered Nickelback‘s Silver Side Up album and there are certain lines in this track that reflect how I felt that night. She’s okay now, as far as I know. Although, I never stop thinking of her. I’ll never walk away and I’ll always be here when she’s ready to come out and talk. It’s likely that this track will sit somewhere near the top of my playlist for the immediate future. It resonated with me over a decade ago, but for no apparent reason back then. I only wish I could’ve found a decent live recording on YouTube.
I’m suffering a bit right now, feeling a lot of emptiness after having shed a few tears nearly two-hours ago. Today, I was supposed to meet up with my best friend for the first time in over three months; five-months to the day since we first met in person. She’s had to call it off as she’s been in some physical pain this week, which I completely respect and understand, having injured my back twice in the last fortnight alone.
I might go in to more detail on this later this evening. For now, I’d like to share this song with you, which came up through my YouTube feed earlier, while waiting to hear from her:
I love this line (or two):
“What’s wrong with you is good
For what’s wrong with me”
That’s always spoken volumes to me for the way I feel about her and my attraction to someone with bipolar disorder. I’ve started reading a book written from the experiences of loving and caring for someone with the condition. I don’t mean to make it sound as though it’s unhealthy in any way; it just summarises how I feel we made one of our first connections.
Earlier this week, I had my first counselling session session for a few weeks. Reflecting now, as I have been ever since, I feel confused about what was discussed in that session. A lot was said and I’ve asked for a list to jog my memory as I feel like I’ve already forgotten some of the important issues that came up.