Two New Books

Not two to have arrived by my own pen or fingers but, I collected these from the local Post Office this evening, after a little bit of spending at Amazon, earlier in the week (ironically, this follows the news this week that HMV have gone bust and also, that Blockbuster may be heading towards a similar fate). It’s kind of ironic also, that I’ve taken this photo against the backdrop of my laptop!


I recently e-mailed someone who was in the writing course that finished before Christmas (everyone’s e-mail address was included in the weekly writings from the our tutor). She seemed to welcome the message as I had asked about a book she bought in to share on our final day (that reminds me – I still haven’t shared the poem, of someone else, that I read aloud).

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Daily Prompt: ‘This is Your Life’

If you could read a book containing all that has happened and will ever happen in your life, would you? If you choose to read it, you must read it cover to cover.

…Can I pre-date a blog post? 😛

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Poem: ‘Did You Know It?’

According to Bex, I need to keep writing and posting new poems and, as I did say that I’d written two more in the past week, I have another one to share with you this evening (it may be a different time of day for you, depending on where you are in the world). This would’ve been my original second choice to be read-out at college. Again, it lacks the emotion behind ‘Courage‘.

One point I think I forgot to mention last time was that, when asked about how we approach and create poems, I responded to say that my poems come from thought, where as short stories and born of experiences. Poems are more spontaneous, for me at least.

Before I start, I feel inclined to mention that I thought about sharing this on Facebook (under my real name) to see how people might respond. But, as it’s appearing here, I doubt I’ll do that, for the risk of drawing too much attention.

‘Did you Know It?’

If I told you I could write
Would you stay, without a fight?
To those who do not know
There is a world I’ve yet to show

Deep inside
All the time
In my mind
Yes, I can rhyme!

Assuming eyes
You’d like to know
Withhold your opinions
Perhaps I’ll show

To learn the truth
That’s all I have


‘As Water Falls’ (Poem)

This is one of several poems I’ve written in the last few days as we were asked to write a poem to share with the writing class this evening. What I’m about to share with you know is the one I had intended to share with the class… But, the greater news is that I didn’t share this one. Instead, I shared the one I posted last night (‘Courage’) and it went down very well.

My tutor commented that I ‘describe a lot with very few  words’, or something to that effect. I also heard a definite ‘I like it!‘ from one of the others in the class! 😎

It was great to hear everyone else’s work and how, again, everyone had created and shared something different. I was worried that people  might think of mine as being a bit dark or something but, no other comments were made and it wasn’t as if people began to inch further away from me with their seats! 😉

We’ve got two weeks before (along with the others) I’m expected to share the short story I haven’t even begun to write yet. We also have another homework assignment and I really need to sit down and put myself in a position to write freely and in good time. I have bad habits that lead me towards blogging and e-mailing others that distract me from my work. No disrespect to any of you and please do not feel as though you may have to change anything; I’m the one who needs to stop procrastinating and leaving things until the final evenings when I’m already tired from work.

I manage to pick up on a few points in the story we read through tonight, which is good, considering I have such difficulty concentrating and remembering what I have read, especially when someone else is reading aloud. I feel kind of guilty sometimes as others seem to pick up on some much more. I never grasp it first time. If there’s one disappointment though, it’s that I didn’t seize a potential opportunity to help someone who asked the group for a lift to her car. No-one else was going that way and, although it would’ve meant a minor diversion on my journey home, I would’ve been happy to help. I felt it would’ve been awkward though as we’ve not even said hello and, to be fair, she seemed to direct her question to the other end of the room.

Still, I shouldn’t dwell on things like this. Please continue reading to see the poem that I was going to share:

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Cat Dream

I’ve been trying to remember a dream I had last night. There wasn’t really anything that I could recall from the moment I woke up this morning, except for the fact that one of three previous cats (the last and eldest) was sitting in the garden.

It was at home and, as I can recall, the garden was like an amalgamation of the house I live in now and the one where I spent the most years during childhood (my favourite – also where we had the most pets). They’re in the same village, either way and I felt as though I was younger than I am now, in this dream. No more than early-teens, if even that.

I was walking around the garden (looking for something?) when I came across the cat (Bramble) sat on a path. She was crying out in pain and I could hear this from a distance a way. As I found her, I could see that the majority of her nose was missing! It had been removed, by force and there was some blood. I wanted to go closer to stroke and comfort her but, I was also afraid of how she might react or, that she didn’t want that form of attention.

Then, I can remember going inside to find mum for help but, she didn’t want to know, telling me to just leave her alone or let her get on with it, or something. I went back outside to see Bramble again but she was still the same. I didn’t know what to do and felt worried because she clearly needed help and I wasn’t able to provide that for her. Well, I’m not sure if the feelings were ‘personal’ but, you know.

Bramble was our third cat. Before her, both of our other cats died – the first (Linus), I forget (he was old – and used to wee in the toilet!) while Maggie (still quite young) was partially run over by a car. After dragging herself up the drive, she had to be put down; there was no other way. Bramble was much older when we got her (twelve, I think?). She ‘came to us’ one evening, having been neglected by neighbours up the road and we came to take her in as our own. She wasn’t the friendliest at times (I remember her scratching me when I once tried to play with her in her basket) and eventually became quite ill. I’m sure mum described it as a form of dementia… She’d lose her sight and would begin walking in to things. I’ve never forgotten the confusing (almost comical) image of her trying to get under the stretcher rail beneath one of the kitchen chairs – picture this as something that runs between two chair legs and sits only two or three inches off the floor and you’ll get what I mean. No cat or even a kitten could fit under it. I can’t honestly remember but, I assume she had to be put down.

We had a lop-eared rabbit at the same time and I have one fond memory of how Bramble came to his rescue, one afternoon, from a predator circling overhead. Floppy (I was young!!) was a bit of a pain and a tease to Bramble, often bumping in to her and trying to provoke a reaction. It was as though they never got along as friends. But one day, this large bird was circling above him. Bramble noticed the predator eyeing up its innocent prey and sat herself beside him. It was amazing and I wish I had a photo to share! Needless to say, the big bird left them both well alone! 🙂

That’s a bit about my dream last night and also, of my most last feline companion, Bramble. We’ve seen and lost many pets over the years and I’m sure I would have many stories to tell.

A Record-Breaking Day!

Yesterday was quite a record-breaker, in terms of the number of hits to reach this site within a twenty for hour period. It peaked at a total of 127 hits before midnight last night – almost three-times the record previously set a month ago!

It probably helps that I managed to make five posts in that time and most of my referrals (aside from the odd Google search) did come direct from WordPress (probably the Reader). But, I’d like to say a big THANK YOU to everyone who visited, read and also commented yesterday. It has helped me to get up and feel better in myself today. 🙂

On an average day, the majority of these views seem to come from Australia. It looks as though the UK topped yesterday’s chart though, with 67 hits over 29. Behind that, we have the USA, Canada and, further down the list, a viewer from Israel!


I did my self-esteem meditation this morning, before I got up, and it is helping, even though there’s nothing but rain falling from the sky outside, meaning that I’ll be stuck in doors for most of this last day off – I do still have some writing to do for my course tomorrow evening… I mentioned on Bourbon’s blog that I have trouble crying – I feel the emotion and it starts but then, it stops again, before I’ve let it all out. I don’t know why but, I’m going to try and make an effort to document some of my daily thoughts in a small diary, when I can. This isn’t something that I ever discussed with my counsellor but I hope it might help. I have great difficulty focusing on my own thoughts and often experience too many at once. Again, I’ve not talked about this either but, I’ve never been certain as to whether my conscience is just that or, whether there is actually ‘a voice’ inside of my head… I’ve suffered my fair share of paranoia over the years but it’s one of those things where I haven’t actively tried to overcome it… Did it really go away or, have I just learnt to accept and suppress it?

On Keeping Up

We all know that writing your own blog and keeping it updated regularly can be difficult enough, especially in times where the thoughts may not be coming; no matter how you want those words to appear on the screen, it just doesn’t happen. Doing the thirty-days of truth challenge certainly helps to create new content regularly but, I find it as difficult to keep up with all the other blogs I follow.

I think I have around sixty WordPress followers of this site (the rest are made up of followers by e-mail and Twitter) and I follow the majority of them. I prefer to receive e-mail notifications in my inbox of new posts – if I’m away from the site for a day or two then, there’s the risk that I could miss something by only using the Reader, here on WordPress. When I started, this wasn’t too bad. But, as the number of blogs I follow has increased, the unread messages in my inbox have been piling up.

If you go to your Reader (hover over the ‘W’ icon in the top left and select ‘Reader’, then ‘Edit List’, below the header), you’ll see that you can alter the frequency of how often these messages are received. Mine all started off as Instant. Then, as the numbers grew, I reassigned the more regular bloggers to ‘Daily’ updates. Now though, I’ve put everyone on to ‘Weekly’ e-mail updates.

Scroll down below the Topics on your left and you’ll see ‘Email Delivery Settings’. This is where you can alter the default settings for any new blog you follow, so you don’t have to keep returning to this page each time you find a new blog you like.

This feels more comfortable as I received a stack of e-mails once a week and, I’ll casually work my way through them; starting with the oldest posts and ending with the newest. I might only read two or three blogs a day but, it feels better organised, with less overlap between unread messages.

So, if you read my blog and you know that I’m also following you but, you don’t see me hitting that ‘Like’ button or leaving a comment then, I hope you can now understand why. I am still reading, it’s just my new form of organisation 🙂

This is only my method for keeping on top of things. Other people like the reader, which is equally fine.