It’s been another long time since my previous post and I’d like to begin by wishing a warm and Merry Christmas to everyone who happens upon this post! 🙂 Oh, and I also wish you the very best of success for 2015!
A friend of mine often writes about inner critics (of course, she’s not the only one) and I’m no stranger to effects of self-destruction and low-lying self-esteem.
For while now [to put that in to perspective – I think I first entertained this thought sometime before my last post!], I’ve had it in mind to re-assume writing down my thoughts and until very recently, I’ve been brilliant at creating every excuse not to do this… Then, last week, I finally bought myself a notebook and over the weekend, I grabbed a spare pen to place ink on the first page!
Okay. So I feel an urge to write this evening. This post is lacking the pre-emptive clarity and layout that usually precedes my writing. But, if I don’t do it now, I might not do it tomorrow.
I’d like to start by thanking everyone who has responded to my previous posts and not forgetting those who have merely clicked Like or taken the time to read through my words. Writing has helped. My week is improving as the days go by. Thank you.
So, I recently wrote a post about noises in the social situations that disturb and distract me, as a sufferer of social anxiety. Possibly the best example I’ve seen that demonstrates my own vision of this comes from the film Bruce Almighty. I’d been hoping to find a video clip of the restaurant scene (if you’ve seen the film then you’ll know it). There is one on YouTube but, without sound, it’s quite irrelevant. The video I have found gives you a taster but I want to reassure you that I don’t hear individual voices. In fact, I don’t focus on any one conversation in particular. It’s more of a ‘blur’ or stream of noise, voice and sound.
I hope it helps to make sense and that maybe someone else can relate. It’s not something that’s occurred recently and only arise on the busiest of occasions (perhaps at a city centre festival or a large indoor event).
He’s back again! I don’t know how long it’s been but he seemed to arrive suddenly yesterday, during the late-afternoon/evening. Anxiety. Fear. Hopelessness. However I like to label it, he’s here with me again right now.